Epic Fail While Becoming A Fudge Boss

10 Jun


Growing up, my Dad would always make homemade fudge. I’d say when I grow up, I’m gonna make fudge too.

Well, when I grew up, I tried to make fudge and I tried to make fudge, and I tried to make fudge about 100 times and guess what, it never turned out. EVER.

I always ended up with too runny fudge, hard as a brick fudge, can’t even distinguish what this is fudge and  you almost did it but not quite fudge. Looking back, I guess I probably could have used a candy thermometer and had much better luck, but my Dad never used a fancy smancy thermometer. He just worked it out like a “BOSS”.

This last weekend, I finally tasted sweet victory. I made “THE” fudge and it was exactly as it was when I was a kid. OMG!!!!

So during this fudge making process, my fudge started boiling over. Well, hell would have frozen over before I was gonna stop stirring. Cause you know the number one golden rule of fudge making is never stop stirring!!!

I’m stirring like a mad man and all the while that 4000 degree  sugar concoction was burning onto my stove top. My house was so smokey that I should have been wearing a respirator, did I stop stirring. Absolutely not.

So after the fudge making was over I immediately called my Dad and proclaimed my triumph and told him I would personally deliver him a sample right away.

After the goods were delivered, I promptly came back to clean up the disaster area known as my kitchen.

Here’s where the epic fail comes in, are you ready?

The entire burner was covered in what looked like volcanic rock and after an hour of scrubbing and using every cleaning product in my cabinet,  I finally got it to where I could see the actual burner.

Ut Oh, this don’t look right, these indentions are definitely not supposed to be there.  I found out that these indentions are called “pitting” and it’s what happens when you ignore burning sugar on a ceramic stove top.

Alas, it cannot be repaired. Epic fail.


If you too want to taste sweet victory and you feel an urgent need for fudge, follow the recipe below, but if you didn’t read the entire post and end up burning your stove top into an oblivion,  I never gave you this recipe and I don’t know you.

Dad’s Fudge

2 cups sugar

4 Tablespoons unsweetened Hershey’s Cocoa

1 cup milk

1 Tablespoon peanut butter

1 teaspoon vanilla

Combine your sugar, cocoa and milk in a saucepan {a very tall one, so your fudge can’t escape} on a medium to high heat start stirring the mixture until your reach a boil.

Stir, stir, stir, keep stirring until its VERY bubbly and when you can start to see the bottom of the pan while stirring and the mixture starts coating the back of the spoon, drop a few drops in a glass of cold water and see if balls up.

If it doesn’t ball up, keep stirring and testing.

When it finally balls up in the cold water, take your fudge off the heat,  stir in the vanilla and peanut butter and pour immediately onto a buttered plate.

You have to work fast now. You will know if it’s gonna turn out right, cause it starts to set up almost instantly when poured on the plate.

Cut into squares and enjoy your fudge. You are now a fudge Boss, congratulations!



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